Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Any Two Schmucks

So, this post and its possible futility might well negate the seriousness I hoped to impart with the prior entry, but I was just thinking about how in life, people have talking points, and often times, these are talking points that they have unknowingly and unintentionally co-opted from others. After talking to a friend about a wedding, I thought about how the usual reaction among my age group when friends are getting married is a sense that we are getting older, that it's hard to believe friends are getting married, etc. This reaction is viral, so that when one is about 21, s/he is bound to express it. I too have reflexively agreed with this sentiment in the past, but tonight I thought about this milestone in a new light: Any pair of schmucks can get married. There are people who get married for the right reasons and people who get married for the wrong reasons, and considering we are told that half of marriages end in divorce, I wouldn't use weddings among my age group as a barometer of having Figured Life Out. I'm not saying I have it figured out but thinking that a wedding or a mortgage or an investment portfolio is a sign of growing up is as foolish as thinking that adults don't make mistakes. So if I am talking with friends about marriage, I herein vow to advance my talking point that any two schmucks can get married, unless of course I run the risk of sounding like a total kiljoy, in which case I'll just play along.


Chris said...

If everyone viewed marriage as Charlotte Lucas does in Austen's P&P ("Happiness in marriage is entirely a matter of chance." And "I am not romantic, you know. I never was. I ask only a comfortable home; and considering Mr. Collins's character, connections, and situation in life, I am convinced that my chance of happiness with him is as fair as most people can boast on entering the marriage state.") people wouldn't expect so much out of a marriage and might actually be more apt to work at it but I don't know if it would make anyone any happier.

Elaine said...

yeah, i think i have what would be considered a really unromantic and unexciting view of what a so-called successful marriage may entail which is two people being able to enjoy a good routine with each other over life.

i may be too young to be this old in mind.

shy-type said...

last week in salon, cary tennis advised a woman in an arranged marriage which she regretted to stay with it ~ i thought his response was interesting ~ he looked at the good and the bad

i'm an old married schmuck and elaine's description as far as i'm concerned ~ well it doesn't get any better than that ~ contentment ~ quite special ~

there is definitely luck involved ~