Thursday, October 06, 2005

Socializing: worth the effort?

There was a time, not so long ago, when I thought socializing was a virtue. One was not making the most of one's time in college, I thought, if he or she wasn't getting out enough, having a little fun, and spending time with friends. As friends of mine graduated or began to live further away from me (which sadly sometimes meant merely a block further), I began to socialize less. In fact, it has come to the point where I cringe at the thought of going out to meet new people and have to make something of an effort to make plans with old friends. Big group activities are not for me, so things such as sorority-fraternity tailgates and off-campus parties are not my cup of tea. I suppose I have gotten complacent with my current social situation, deciding there is no one else worth the effort to get to know, or at least not through the channels we have on campus, and thrown in the towel.

It's not that I don't enjoy a good conversation, on the contrary, I love settings like my thesis seminar where we get to talk about all sorts of interesting things. I guess I've just become tired of the old, boring, college student small-talk of "where do you live," "what are you doing after college" (ha!) and that's the good small talk! The worst is inter-mingling with underclassmen who enjoy talking about things like beer pong and fraternity parties (In all fairness, I know many cool underclassmen who have more to talk about than that, but for some reason my version of "cool" is different than others at this school).

I realized my recent tendency to try and avoid new people and small-talk conversations especially after reading this article from today's Daily Northwestern that deals with unwanted encounters for the socially lazy:
One of the most awkward parts of the quarter is running into people you know only marginally — a friend of a former roommate, the girl you talked to twice in your freshman seminar, your best friend’s two-week fling from last year.
Rather than making the effort to get to know those acquaintances, I, like this writer, usually try and avoid them in any which way possible.

Plus, on most nights, sitting in front of my computer reading the news, watching a movie or an episode of "The Daily Show," and going to bed relatively early seems a lot more appealing than going to Bar Louie where I have to spend money and talk over noise. Is this just an "I'm-done-with-the college-social-scene, time to move on" phase, or am I just indulging anti-social habits? Who knows, but I have to say, I'm done with the college social scene. Onward and hopefully upward. (Though as a misanthrope, I'm not sure if that will ever really be possible ;-) ).


Anonymous said...

and where do i fit in?

Steph said...

It sounds like you're ready to graduate! Your misanthropic tendencies sound totally normal to me. Sometimes though the occassional "social" night can be really fun when you're a senior b/c you just don't give a hoot about what anyone thinks.